Facing Death
by Blackwolfhunting
Summary: "Do not pity the dead Harry. Pity the living, and, above all, those who live without love." Albus Dumbledore once told Harry and now the Boy Who Lived is sure that he pities himself more than anything, for he had finally found family just as he was about to die. Rated M for mentions of Rape and Abuse. Image not Mine!


Facing Death

He breathed in as deep as he possibly could at the moment, his eyes watering as he looked on ahead of him, ignoring the yells coming from the dying Dark Lord, his mind was on other things that had happened to him, starting back from when he was a child living with the Dursleys.

He hadn't really known he was being abused until they had that assembly at school, about how people who got hurt by those they loved or by adoptive, foster, or real parents would hurt a child, a spouse, or another family member. He remembered how he learned that being hit or touched in any physical way that meant harm was wrong and that it shouldn't happen in the first place.

He had told his teacher after the assembly, hoping that maybe he would get away from his uncle after that. He was dreadfully wrong, especially when Social Services showed up to their house and his Uncle and Aunt were questioned on such abuse. They denied it venomously and even showed them the room where Dudley would occasionally share with Piers when he came over. The bunk bed was said to belong to both boys and they showed the drawers of clothes that was again said to belong to both boys.

During this entire time Harry sat in his cupboard, listening to the Social Services person apologize to them about the disturbance but they had gotten a tip that they needed to check. When the person had asked where he was and where his cousin was, Uncle Vernon had told them that they were at their Aunt Marge's for a visit. There were no further questions and Harry was left for another beating by his Uncle Vernon afterwards.

When Harry returned to the school his teacher had called him a liar and would no longer call on him to answer questions and only marked his papers with a little more than distain, causing his already horrible grades to go down the drains.

He couldn't remember a day that he hadn't gone without some sort of beating for something, whether it was for Dudley's bad grades or not finishing his chores, he would be beat repeatedly. He wasn't sure how many scares he had on his back from the belt, and later on, the whip and chains. He couldn't count how many bruises he got from being slapped, punched, kicked, and hit with a frying pan. He couldn't remember a day where he wasn't in some sort of pain.

He could remember the first time his Uncle had used him for something entirely different though, all because his Aunt had refused him on several occasions; she hated the smell of alcohol.

He had been six and had been asleep in his cupboard, nightmares plaguing him because of a recent beating from his uncle that day. The terror that was Vernon would not leave him in night and so he would occasionally scream out in fear in night; a costly mistake.

He had screamed in the middle of that particular night, the night that Vernon had lost a business deal with a big company and he had come home smashed. He had blamed Harry for the loss of business and had proceeded to beat him and so when he had come down to beat Harry again for screaming in terror, he was still drunk and on a high from the earlier beating.

He had dragged Harry out of the cupboard and down the stairs to the basement, throwing him to the ground where he proceeded to kick him repeatedly in the chest. It was only here that he began to feel a new sensation with hurting the boy in front of him, a coil of heat in the pit of his stomach that he knew very well.

He hadn't wasted anytime and had stripped the boy down to his birthday suit and then proceeded to pull his own pants down far enough to enter the unprepared and weakened boy.

Vernon had decided he had loved the sounds that the boy had made and had continued on using the boy from then on.

He remembered everything that Vernon had done to him, especially when Vernon had eventually begun using him to bring in money to the house hold after he got a demotion. He was touched by some of the nastiest, dirtiest, ugliest, and oldest men imaginable. He hated it.

Though Vernon wasn't against using him himself when he felt the urge. He had even used him to teach his son just exactly what sex was like, what it was like to release, to feel the tightness of a partner, of how to make his cousin's life even worse from then on.

He had to deal with both Dursley men after that; though he had hoped that when Petunia had walked in on Dudley using him one day that she would put a stop on it, only she hadn't. All she had said was to tell Dudley to clean up afterwards because they were having guests.

He was left to deal with Vernon and Dudley raping him, tearing him, and breaking him.

He could still remember though when he had gotten his first Hogwarts letter, how he felt awed that he would get any mail whatsoever, he thought he wouldn't get any cause he was just a freak, a slut, a whore, a toy that Vernon would use.

The beating he got after the letter arrived deterred him from grabbing at any others that came his way.

Though when Hagrid had come and gotten him, taking him to Diagon Ally and showing him the wonders of the Wizarding world, he couldn't wait to get out of the Dursley's and hopefully find someone to actually care for him.

Only his hopes had been dashed when he had found out that he would be sent back to the Dursleys at the end of the year, no matter how hard he had begged to stay or be sent anywhere else. Dumbledore had sealed his fate the day he had denied the young boy.

It was only after his fifth year, after he had to deal with that bitch of a toad, lose his godfather who was the only one who had cared for him, not to mention that he found out that he was the one to kill Voldemort and he was the only one, that he finally began to plan for a way to destroy the monster and take out anyone who had hurt him.

It had started with getting into contact with one Draco Malfoy, who had been given a mission by the Dark Lord that year. He had easily known what it was due to the fact that he still had visions from Tom since the man was insistent to drive him insane. He had easily gotten several ideas on how to use Malfoy and get to Tom afterwards.

From there he had Obliviated Snape after he had told the Potions Master his plans; he would release the seal on the memory charm when he really needed Snape for his plan, already knowing that if Snape knew beforehand what he was up to, he would go straight to Dumbledore.

From there he helped Draco fix the vanishing Cabinet in the Room of Requirement, so they could get the Death Eaters into the school. He had smiled at that since his plan had gone on easily from there, keeping some of the most important people alive not to mention keeping Snape in Hogwarts. Though Draco soon had to flee and hide away in Malfoy Manor with his imprisoned parents and with Tom himself.

Harry soon returned to Privet Dr. so he could continue with his plan, but he had forgotten to take into account that his Uncle would put him back to work and that he would be beaten for any little complaint or refusal. By the time Draco had shown up with the others he was about dead from starvation and so sexually abused that he couldn't even stand up on his own.

His plans continued on from there, being introduced to the dark lord, helping Voldemort with his plans, and then he had succeeded with another part of his plans for revenge.

He was able to convince Voldemort to attack Privet Dr. Number 4 and bring his so called family to him. To say that he was satisfied with what he had done with the three of them would've been an understatement. All he could say was that they got a taste of their own medicine.

Though this act had easily kept him on Voldemort's good side, he was allowed to do anything he wanted after that, he was even able to keep Severus and Draco to himself as was his request.

Though Voldemort hadn't anticipated that he would eventually betray him in anyway either way after all, especially after he had told Tom himself what their connection really meant; this left Tom keeping him alive no matter what. Even if it meant keeping him happy by doing whatever he wanted, though he hardly took advantage of that, leaving it to Tom to do what he really wanted to do.

Though Tom soon regretted this choice after he had entered the chambers one day, holding up vial of dark purple potion in his hand. The entire Inner Circle had been summoned that day and they all turned to him, all glaring at him in disdain, but none had moved to attack him. They all knew his connection to Tom and all knew what it meant if they killed him now.

He smiled at Tom as he held up the bottle in front of him and told him exactly what it was and Tom's eyes widened vastly, already knowing what was about to happen.

Harry Potter had uncorked the potion vial and quickly downed it before anyone could stop him. Tom yelled out in pain as Harry's own body began to convulsing, yelling and cursing Harry as both males began to feel their lives began to fade.

All death eaters were rooted to their seats as their master fell to the ground in pain and Harry too fell to the ground, convulsing on his side as he began to die from the poison he had drank. Though none of them moved quick enough to begin dodging the spells from the Order of the Phoenix, who all had jumped into action as they began taking out each frozen Death Eater. Soon all Death Eaters were rounded up and Harry was staring into the eyes of two of the men that had helped him throughout the year, both looking upset.

"Harry, you can't do this, you have to take the antidote!" That was Draco, the boy was reaching for Harry only to have the raven haired teen shake his head tiredly as his body went numb, the convulsions stopping as the Poison began to work on his nervous system and shut down his organs.

"I can't." Harry whispered as he looked at the two men in front of him tiredly. "I have to die." Harry said as he let his eyes unfocused, his eyes tearing up as he thought about what was just about to happen. "I don't want to die." He whispered as tears fell down his face in streams and to the floor, already knowing that it was too late anyways for an antidote and that he needed to die. That didn't mean he wanted to.

The other male sighed as he knelt down in front of Harry, his greasy hair falling into his face as he looked at the boy that had given up everything. "You have done good Potter. You have nothing to fear, you will meet your parents, I'm sure." Snape said as softly as he possibly could, knowing the boy was already frightened.

Harry's eyes filled with tears even more as he looked at the potions master with scared and yet relieved eyes. "I don't know." Harry whispered, his strength leaving him quickly. "I've done some horrible things to people." He admitted without too much of a problem, already knowing that he most likely was going to Hell for killing his family, no matter how horrible they were to him.

Snape shook his head as he conjured up a sneer for the boy's and his own benefit. Potter did not need to see him lose control of his emotions now; he needed someone to just be there for him. "I think not Potter, not with how stubborn and unary you are. I'm sure you'll be up there pulling pranks with your mutt of a godfather in no time."

This elicited a small laugh from Harry, but it was interrupted as he coughed and blood came spilling out of his mouth. The potion was almost all the way through his system.

Draco was crying at this point though, he didn't want to lose Harry, not after everything they had been through together. He was terrified of what he was going to do afterwards, especially when it was found out that he was a Death eater, no matter how forceful his initiation had been or that he had been against it the entire time.

"Harry please, you can't die, not now! What am I going to do without you! What about Granger and Weasly! What about Longbottom or Zabini or Parkinson! What are we going to do without you?!" Draco said as he looked at Harry. "We couldn't have learned half of the defense spells without you, no matter how good Sev is, he couldn't teach us everything you did! We need you Harry! I need you."

Harry shook his head as he looked at Draco. "You don't need me Draco; you can do it if you just try. You're strong enough to take on anything, no need to worry." Harry said as he looked back at Snape. "It hurts." He whispered to the teacher and Snape nodded.

"The Poison you took is fast working but made for the victim to suffer for a little bit before they died. I'm sure that's why you chose it." Snape watched as he got a small nod from Potter before he looked down. "You're still scared." It wasn't a question.

Harry's eyes filled with tears again as he nodded again. "I don't want to die, no matter how much I want Tom dead." Harry whispered, coughing up some more blood as he said this. "I wanted to be a teacher, I wanted to live, I wanted a re-real fam-fami-family." Harry said as he began to sob softly, not sure what he was supposed to do now, now that he was about to die.

Snape clenched his jaw as he reached out and ran a hand through Harry's hair, ignoring the weak flinch that came from the boy. "You have a family you idiot boy." Harry stared up at him surprised, tears still falling down the side of his face and onto the ground. "Haven't Draco and I filled that part for you this year!? Have I not been there to help you when you needed it, comforted you when you needed it, gave you the confidence to go on when you needed it?!" Snape gritted out as he stared at Harry with his best sneer. "You imbecile, we are your family."

Harry looked up at him for as long as he possibly could before he began to cry again. "What's wrong now Potter, I think I just assured you that you have a family." Snape snarled at the dying boy harshly.

Harry could only shake his head as he sobbed even hard. "I-I-I don-don't wan-wa-want to-to di-die!" Harry wailed as more blood flowed from his mouth and now from his nose. "I fin-final-finally hav-have a-a-a fam-fami-family!"

Snape sighed as he realized that he had just caused more stress for the already dying boy. "Do not fear death Potter, for everyone shares that fate." Snape said as he continued to run his hand through the boy's hair. "We will meet you there eventually, even though I'm sure it will be a while, especially with the Dark Lord Dead." Snape's eyes actually widened as he realized that he really truly would be free because the Dark Lord would be 'Dead'!

Harry shook his head. "Doesn't matter, I don't want to die! I want to st-stay wi-with you-you!" Harry trembled at the end as more blood poured from his nose and mouth, his eyes starting to bleed as well, making him look as if he was crying blood. "My-my-my fam-fam-fami-family." Harry's voice was getting ever softer as the poison continued to affect him.

The screams from the Dark Lord roared back to life as he tried to fight for life, causing Harry's eyes to widen as his body jerked from a tremendous amount of magic. Snape snapped his eyes to Voldemort as he rose from the ground, slowly making his way over to Harry, magic crackling around him dangerously. He was sure that if Voldemort had a choice, then he would kill Harry himself instead of just dying at the hand of a poison. Snape snarled at the dark lord as he hit the other with a stunner and because he was still too weak, even with the rest of his magic gathered, Voldemort was unable to dodge or deflect the spell and fell to the ground unconscious.

Snape snarled at the body one more time before returning to Harry and running a calming hand through the boy's hair, hoping to keep him relaxed as the poison finished the two of them off. "Yes Potter, we are you family, no matter what." Snape said as he continued running his hands through the sobbing and bleeding boy's hair.

Draco watched all these events with tears in his eyes and amazement that Snape had no problem hexing the Dark Lord now, as if the last sixteen years of his life had not happened whatsoever and he only did what he wanted now. Draco also turned his gaze back to Harry, his own tears flowing as he realized what kind of condition that the boy was in. Blood covered Harry, his eyes crying blood now, blood running down his nose and into his mouth that was already filled with blood. He finally realized that the poison was too far along to be stopped. Harry would die.

Draco gulped as he reached and took one of Harry's hands into his own and held on tight, knowing that this would comfort Harry, if only a little. Harry smiled at him sadly but the look disappeared as he began to cough up more blood, the coughing not stopping for a solid three minutes. Then Potter's breathing was wheezy and weak, he was close to death's door.

"We are here Potter, do not worry, we are here. We won't leave you now; we will not leave you alone in your time of need." Snape mumbled to the boy as Potter's eyes began to close shut.

"Thank you." Harry whispered as he watched the floor, ignoring the sounds of feet walking around, the Order wrapping things up and no one realizing that their savior was dying at that moment, not realizing that he would soon leave. Harry realized something very important at this time as his eyes were closing softly.

The Wizarding world had not really cared for him, only for the use he could give them.

That didn't matter now though, because he had Snape and Draco, two people who were his family…a strange word that Harry had never had. Family. He would die. Just as he got it. The family he always wanted. Life was so not fair.

"Remember what Dumbledore always says," Snape muttered into a quickly fading Harry's ear, "Death is not the end, but the first step to a new adventure." Harry smiled at that and suddenly, he wasn't so scared anymore.

A new adventure sounded great, exploring new things, meeting new people, a life where he wasn't expected to save anyone or risk his life.

That sounded like paradise.

Harry closed his eyes, but just before everything went dark, he was able to mutter one last thing to the two people who had helped him with everything. "Family."

The last thing Harry heard before he left though was something he never thought he would hear. "Yes, that's right Harry, we are your family."

'Snape called me Harry.' Harry thought as a smile graced his face as he finally lost hold on his life.

xFacingDeathx

Snape watched as Potter's breathing finally left him, his skin wouldn't cool for a little while yet and he knew that. He just sat there though, even though he knew Potter was dead, he just sat there. 'No, not Potter,' Snape thought as he looked at the pale skin of the boy he was running his hands through the hair of, 'this is Harry, not Potter.' He felt the familiar burn of tears at the back of his eyes.

He didn't stop them from coming or falling down his face.

Draco watched as Harry took his last breath and he felt his own tears strengthen as he began to feel the loss of a great friend and would be lover. He would heal eventually, but he doubted that he would ever feel the same for anyone else ever again.

Draco didn't hold back as he felt the cooling tips of the other boy's fingers and released a wail of such despair that it surprised many of the order members working in the room, and many rushed over towards them to see what had happened. They all froze when they saw the dead boy that had once been Harry Potter, The-Boy-Who-Lived, only now he was dead.

Tonks covered her mouth as she stared at the lifeless form of a boy she had known for a while now, the fun loving and always kind Harry; she wasn't sure what she would do now. Remus would be heart broken when he found out; Remus being locked away during this time since it was a full moon.

Mad Eye Moody could only stare at the body of a boy that had done everything to stop a megalomaniac from taking over the world, even in his death. He bowed his head towards the boy and held his silence in his honor, knowing that the boy wouldn't get a whole lot of respect since he had made it public that he did not intend on helping the light but the dark.

Several more people came and saw what had become of the Boy-Who-Lived, all crying now as they realized that he was truly dead. After everything they had gone through to get him out alive, to destroy Voldemort and to keep him alive, wasted because he had died in a puddle of his own blood. They all noticed the bloody tears and the blood from his nose and mouth; all wondering what had caused it.

No one would know for sure why Harry Potter died that day or how, the information lying solely on the shoulders of Draco Malfoy and Severus Snape.

xFaceingDeathx

The Wizarding world was celebrating.

For good reason as well; Voldemort was dead, gone, buried six feet under, fish food, in the eternal sleep, whatever you wanted to say, but by the end of the day it was known that the Dark Lord was dead. Everyone was cheering and celebrating, especially since Dumbledore announced that Voldemort wouldn't return ever again.

Though this information was only a consolation prize for other people, those people being the friends to one Harry Potter. They all felt the loss of their friend, of their family, of the little brother that they had taken into their family and helped care for since he was a first year. Now though, they could feel the gap that he had left with his death.

The only thing that would make them feel better was if they knew how he died and the only ones who knew had just been called to the headmaster's office. Severus Snape and Draco Malfoy were now standing in front of everyone that had been close to Harry; that meant that the entire Weasly clan was there, Hermonie Granger, Remus Lupin, Nymphadora Tonks, Neville Longbottom, and Luna Lovegood; they were all intent on hearing what had happened to their friend.

Snape stood in front of the entire group, blocking Draco from view since the boy was still suffering from the loss of Harry, tears still falling from his eyes since he could still feel, see, and hear the raven haired boy's death. Snape was intent on telling this story so Draco didn't have to suffer even more retelling of what had happened.

Snape took a deep breath and stepped forward as he looked around the room, his hands shaking as he clenched them tightly. "Potter, no, Harry," Snape said as he looked around the room, his eyes landing on Ron Weasley and Hermonie Granger, "Harry had a plan to destroy the Dark Lord once and for all, but for you to understand this plan, you must understand his connection to the Dark Lord."

The sobs in the room quieted as Snape began to talk and everyone listened intently as Snape began to tell what Harry had found out about his connection, what he had decided he would do during his sixth year and eventually why he had done what he had done to his muggle relatives.

Everyone in the room cried even harder as they heard of the hard times Harry had been put through by his relatives, what his Uncle did to him, his cousin, even what his Aunt had done though not as bad as the earlier mentioned. Several cussed up a storm and stormed about the room as they listened to Snape, about how Harry had eventually decided enough was enough after the Weasley Matriarch had been killed.

"He used a special poison that worked through his body quickly but gave him enough time to talk before he truly died." Snape said as he felt tears begin to burn in his eyes. "He told me that…" Snape coughed to clear his throat at the unusual show of emotion, "He said that he was…"

"He said he was afraid to die, that he didn't want to die, but he knew that he had to if he wanted to kill the Dark Lord." Everyone turned to look at Draco as he stood up and turned towards them, tears falling down his face. "He helped me with everything all year, helped me rescue my parents, helped keep Sev alive after it was revealed that he was a spy, he could look the Dark Lord in the face and insult him, but he was terrified of dying." Draco said as he turned to look at the other two thirds of the Golden Trio. "He was terrified of leaving behind his family that he had just found."

The room burst into more tears, all crying even harder as they realized how much they must've meant to Harry for him to call them family. "He didn't want to leave us behind and so he fought for as long as he could, he did everything he could think of to kill the Dark Lord without dying himself, but he just couldn't take it after Mrs. Weasley died." Draco said as he looked at the ground, tears falling to the ground as he clenched his fists tightly, not looking at anyone.

Everyone was silent as they watched Draco in pain, as the blond haired Malfoy cried and mourned for someone who had helped him so much when they had suffered even more than he.

Ron took a deep breath and stepped towards the blonde and put a hand on his shoulder. Malfoy blinked and looked up at the red head and stared at him in shock. Ron smiled slightly at him as tears fell down his face too. "I have to thank you Malfoy," Ron started and gulped as he looked into the sorrowful mercury eyes, "you were there with him when he died, especially since I was still holed up at Grimmauld. You were there when I wasn't able to and you had to watch him as he died. I don't think I could be as strong as you." Ron said as he stared at Malfoy with gratitude.

Malfoy could only stare at him, startled at that before he nodded. He was exceedingly surprised though when a head of bushy brown hair glomped him, arms wound around his neck. "Thank you Malfoy, we owe you for just being there for him when we couldn't." Hermonie said as she stepped back enough to peck him on the cheek and then turned to Ron and cried into his chest.

After the last of the Golden Trio had thanked him, everyone else walked up to Snape and Malfoy both and thanked them before walking out and leaving the two behind to their own thoughts.

Snape looked around in the Headmaster's office, wondering where the old man was, wondering if he would show up anytime soon. "Do you think I did the right thing, telling them that?" Draco asked as he stared at his hands unsure of what to do now that he had done his talking and had told everyone what exactly had happened to the Golden Boy before he had really died.

Snape stared at his Godson and sighed as he thought of what exactly to say, but he knew the young man would need this no matter what. "You told them something that would…for lack of better words…would give them peace. They needed that so that they could let go and move on. I think you did the right thing Draco." Snape said as he laid a hand on Draco's shoulder. "I am proud of how you handled that." A sneer appeared on Snape's face though as he said, "Especially Weasley's acceptance, as little as it might mean." A roll of the eyes was able to get a chuckle out of Draco.

"I do hope you boys don't mind me stepping in at this point." Snape and Draco blinked as they turned and looked at the Headmaster that had been incognito the last two hours. "But I do have someone here that I need to introduce as he will be taking over the Defense against the Dark Arts Position here this September." Dumbledore said as he watched Snape react with rage.

"You old Coot! You just lost your Golden Boy and you're already looking for a DADA Professor…Wait…I'm the DADA Professor, you can't just fire me like that!" Snape snarled as he looked at Dumbledore with distaste.

Dumbledore's eyes were twinkling with mischief as he looked at his once DADA professor, only to laugh slightly. "I'm sorry Severus but with Slughorn dead, I need a Potions Professor and the only one qualified would be you." Dumbledore said as he popped a Lemon Drop in his mouth.

Snape snarled as he looked at the Professor before shaking his head and turning to leave the room, only stopping when the door to the office opened in front of him. "Leaving already Snape, I would've thought you would like to show me to my rooms."

Snape gulped as he stared at the figure in front of him, wondering how this had happened, how he was still there standing in front of him when he had seen him die.

Snape turned on his heel and looked at Dumbledore for an explanation, ignoring the cry of joy coming from Draco as the blond boy ran towards the raven haired figure in the doorway.

Dumbledore's eyes continued to twinkle as he clasped his hands together and hid his mouth behind them as he leaned forward on his desk. "There was more to that connection then I let on Severus, so much more."

xSoMuchMorex

A.N. I hope you all liked this one shot it was fun to write and now I leave you with this! It is not going to have anything else attached to it! It is only a ONESHOT! Nothing more and nothing less. Review and tell me what ya think!

I would like everyone to think about some of the authors on Fanfiction that died recently or a while ago. Some of them died in tragic accidents or illnesses and have left stories unfinished or had others finish them for them in memory. I would like everyone reading this to lower their heads, clasp their hands together and pray for those who have been lost. Allow there to be a moment of silence for wherever you, the reader, are and remember not just the writers here on this site but those who have been lost in your life or in tragic events.

Please remember that life is short and that you should love those in your life while you can and show your appreciation for water comes into your life.

Again, thanks to those who have lost their lives for spreading inspiration through their works.


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